Former Detroit Mayor Laughs Way to Jail

Former Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick Sentenced

Jailed former Detroit mayor Kwame Kilpatrick taunted prosecutors and talked of a comeback even as he got carted away today, according to the Detroit Free Press. Kilpatrick reached a plea deal last month pleading guilty to two felonies and no contest to a third.

He blamed the media and Michigan governor Jennifer Granholm for his fall from grace in a news conference in September. That’s even though he got caught having an affair with his chief of staff, Christine Beatty and lied about it under oath. His wife wasn’t complaining because he leased her a fancy Lincoln Navigator with city funds and Kwame was running up ridiculous amounts on city credit cards.

And authorities have concrete proof of the affair because Kilpatrick and Beatty texted each other on city issued phones. Heaving sigh. But you know who’s even dumber than Kilpatrick? The throng of supporters that cheered him in court and will get behind his inevitable comeback attempt. He’ll only do 120 days in jail as part of his plea bargain but most importantly can’t run for public office for five years.

That’s huge because it saves some extremely misguided Detroit voters from themselves for half a decade. The judge even chastised Kilpatrick for his appalling lack of contrition under these circumstances. This guy even wore a dress shirt with “Mayor” embroidered on the cuffs to his sentencing. Who has a dress shirt with mayor embroidered on the cuffs? That will go great with his nice orange jumpsuit that says “inmate.”

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