Simply Dumb

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I’m no PR major – I opted for the less financially sound but very rewarding field of journalism. Sigh. But it seems like if you’re going to jaunt on over to Washington to beg for $25 billion in taxpayer money, you might not want to take your expensive private jet.
The chief execs for the Big Three automakers came under fire after an ABC News report revealed they flew to Washington (while seeking financial aid from the government) in private jets. GM CEO Richard Wagoner’s flight alone cost an estimated $20,000. GM alone would like $10-12 billion.
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I’m not sure whether this is a study in psychology or a sad commentary on the current price of gas. Maybe it’s a little bit of both. CNN reports that in Nashville on Friday somehow the rumor got out that the city would be out of gas within a matter of hours.
The rumor began snowballing towards truth when people began to panic and there was a run on area gas stations. It reportedly got so bad that …read more

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No, we are really not joking here though we wish we were. Reuters reports that JetBlue, a company famous for providing passengers perks like free television and leather seats, is raising prices to cope with fuel costs.
The airline will no longer provide pillows free of charge and in fact will begin selling a pillow and blanket kit for $7. It’s OK though, because the pillow and blanket are extremely eco-friendly according to the airline.
The kit is made by CleanBrands LLC, and is supposedly “the world’s cleanest” due to its, wait for it, toxin-blocking fabric.  Well, gosh, I take everything …read more

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We’ve written so much about gas prices that we actually gave it its own category. It’s not even halfway through summer and people are already going crazy, doing dumb things in the name of saving a bit of money.
Here are our top gas-related stories:

$100 in gas buys a baby’s name
German man burns car in protest
Woman burning mad about gas prices
Desperate times: Truck rigged to swipe fuel
For sale: Free gun (or gas) with purchase of car
Farmer uses mules to save gas
Gas thief burns himself while stealing
Gasoline protest singer arrested
Desperate to save on gas

We’re pretty sure that the list will grow …read more

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Now you really know gas has gotten too high for everyone when gang members start doing drive-bys on a bike. Yes, a bicycle.
A man and a woman were shot by two men on bicycles in South Los Angeles. The men rolled up, shot the two, and then pedaled away. The man was hit in the hand, while the woman was hit in the rear. As in rear end. Ouch.
Police think that the incident is gang-related. Unfortunately, the shooters haven’t been located yet.
That’s pretty sad, folks. Not only did those two poor people get shot, it was done via bicycle drive-by. …read more

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We’re starting to see some crazy stuff, all in the name of high gas prices. People stealing fuel, protesting, setting things on fire. But this one may take the cake… for now.
A Florida man plans to name his son after some morning radio DJs. For $100 in gasoline. Do you know that right now, here in California that equals ONE tank of gas in our Dodge Ram? One. And David Partin is selling the right to name his newborn son. For that.
Now the baby isn’t due until winter, so he’ll have to wait until then to claim his prize. The …read more

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A German man poured gasoline over his BMW and lit it in protest of outrageous fuel prices. He drove the car onto a lawn near the Frankfurt convention center. He hopped out, poured the gas onto the car, and lit it up.
When the fire department arrived, it was already too late for the car.
The man, unemployed, claimed he couldn’t afford to drive any longer. He has yet to be charged with a crime, though. Gas prices continue to rise all over the world. A litre in Germany is about 1.55, or around $9.40 per gallon.
Makes you almost happy to pay …read more

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A Danville, California woman set fire to two gas stations and a Starbucks in protest of high gas prices June 4. We’re not sure where the Starbucks figured into that equation. But then it doesn’t look like she was processing things exceptionally well that day.
According to Sacramento’s KCRA Diane Craig, 64, was arrested on premeditated arson and burglary. Police said Craig used fireplace logs and a lighter to set fires in the restroom of an Arco station, a Chevron and the aforementioned Starbucks. Maybe she figured as long as she was on a roll, she’d protest $4 lattes too. …read more

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Wait, that’s not what we meant to say. We mean that Simply Dumb has a new category aptly titled, “Gas Is Too Freakin’ High.” We want to hear about any crazy gas stories from your neck of the woods. Did somebody (not you of course) do something really ignorant in the pursuit of saving gas?
We’re going to be keeping our eye on crazy gas shenanigans all summer long as gas continues to be a more valuable commodity than solid gold. But don’t think we just want gas. I mean gas news. Let us know about any stupidity we haven’t …read more

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As gasoline passes the $4/ gallon mark in many places and heads to $5, people are getting desperate to save money. Or, in this case, just outright steal. And boy, are they getting crafty.
Police think that a large theft of diesel fuel in western Pennsylvania was perpetrated with a specially-equipped pickup trailer. It had a trap door and vacuum hose. It looks like someone would hide in the trailer and siphon diesel from underground fuel tanks by lowering a hose and vacuuming out the fuel into an empty 15-foot propane tank.
With diesel prices even higher than unleaded fuel, it’s not …read more

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