Simply Dumb » australia http://www.simplydumb.com Dumb, stupid and weird news from b5media Thu, 12 Feb 2009 01:34:05 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.1 en hourly 1 Low-speed chase – with golf carts http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/10/low-speed-chase-with-golf-carts/ http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/10/low-speed-chase-with-golf-carts/#comments Thu, 30 Oct 2008 03:18:52 +0000 http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/10/29/low-speed-chase-with-golf-carts/ Post from: Simply Dumb

]]> Golfcarts NcWe’re constantly hearing about high-speed police chases where someone runs from the cops and is pursued all over the place in an attempt to capture said person. Because if somebody runs, they have something to hide.

So it tickled our funny bone just a little bit to hear of a low-speed chase in northern Australia. With golf carts. Turns out that a group of boys grabbed a golf cart from a resort and took it for a joy ride. So two resort employees gave chase. In another cart.

We picture an OJ-esque chase down the street in super-slow-mo as the resort employees attempt to speed up enough to catch the boys.

The boys abandoned the cart when police arrived, and fled the scene. One, a 10-year-old, was caught. The other boys, ranging from 10 to 16, managed to escape. The cart was recovered undamaged.

The best part of the story? Said chase happened near the city of Darwin.

[source] Image: Newscom

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]]> http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/10/low-speed-chase-with-golf-carts/feed/ 0 Man Survives Shark Attack With Eye Poke http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/05/man-survives-shark-attack-with-eye-poke/ http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/05/man-survives-shark-attack-with-eye-poke/#comments Tue, 13 May 2008 02:21:13 +0000 http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/05/12/man-survives-shark-attack-with-eye-poke/ Post from: Simply Dumb

]]> Shark Image This is like something out of Wild Kingdom meets the Three Stooges. The Associated Press reports that on Saturday Australian Jason Cull was getting mauled by a 16-foot shark in the waters near Middleton Beach. He wrestled with the shark and finally escaped by poking it in the eye.

Now he, folks, is a man and a half. That’s right, he took a page from Nature Boy Ric Flair’s playbook. While the shark severely damaged Cull’s leg, obviously things could have been much, much worse. I can’t imagine actually having the presence of mind to process things and semi-calmly think about how to thwart a shark.

Yeah, his leg may be messed up but Cull is now known among all his friends as an official badass. There should be a movie about this guy. It could be the comeback vehicle Paul Hogan is looking for.

“You call that a shark? That’s not a shark…”

Image by Scott S101 licensed under Creative Commons.

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]]> http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/05/man-survives-shark-attack-with-eye-poke/feed/ 4 Blind a Pilot, Go to Jail http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/04/blind-a-pilot-go-to-jail/ http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/04/blind-a-pilot-go-to-jail/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2008 17:15:15 +0000 http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/04/24/blind-a-pilot-go-to-jail/ Post from: Simply Dumb

]]> 76467753_1500be2d9d_m.jpgNew South Wales has banned laster pointers. Now why would a major Australian state go and do something like that? Because some dummies have decided that it’s fun to shine the high-intensity lasers into cockpits. The temporarily blinded pilots don’t think it’s nearly as funny though. And neither does the government, which has assigned a jail term of up to 14 years for anyone caught carrying them without a permit.

Several pilots recently reported instances of high-powered lasers being shown into the cockpit during landings and take-offs. Just a moment of blindness could cause serious consequences. So serious, in fact, that the government will treat the laser pointers like firearms when it comes to imports.

What is with people? Why would anyone get their jollies with something like that? Truly, it is an example of someone who is Simply Dumb.

image: mateoutah on flickr

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]]> http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/04/blind-a-pilot-go-to-jail/feed/ 0 Poisonous Spider Infestation in Australian Hospital http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/04/poisonous-spider-infestation-in-australian-hospital/ http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/04/poisonous-spider-infestation-in-australian-hospital/#comments Thu, 24 Apr 2008 03:10:25 +0000 http://www.simplydumb.com/2008/04/23/poisonous-spider-infestation-in-australian-hospital/ Post from: Simply Dumb

]]> 2227198944_8b0953bca4_m.jpgIf you’re an arachnophobe, you may just want to move on from this post. That is, if the picture didn’t already send you scurrying on your way. A small Australian hospital had to close due to an influx of venomous spiders. We’re already shuddering at the thought.

The Baralaba Multi Purpose Health Service planned to close for fumigation to get rid of redback spiders. Warm weather caused more eggs to hatch than normal, and a large number have planted themselves inside the hospital. The spiders have a painful bite and poisonous venom, but they are rarely fatal.

Patients will be moved temporarily while an exterminator fumigates the entire building. They’re hoping to kill all of the spiders and their eggs. Don’t know about you, but we’re still shuddering.

Here in the States, the closest comparison would be the black widow spider. In fact, the hourglass markings on the redback closely resemble the fiddle shape on the black widow. But we don’t plan on getting close enough to either of them to do a scientific comparison. Pictures are plenty close, thank you very much.

image: corndog_au on flickr

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